God writes the best stories. That these 4 (and one in heaven) would be mine is overwhelming. One I chose. One came from modern medicine. One came for a short time but left an incredible mark on my heart. One came after months of trying. One came as a complete surprise. They all came by God's providence and by His hand in His time. I am humbled and honored to be their mom.
This precious note just about made me cry. Samuel can't spell worth a lick but he is so tender hearted and I'm so thankful for this letter and the window into his heart. He knows his story of adoption and I know deep down he has lots of emotions and wounds that he will work through the rest of his life. I'm so thankful that God called us to him and that I get to be a part of his healing and giving him the feelings of safety and knowing he is adored. That is every child's birthright. He in turn has given me great joy in making me a mama first! He wrote this in his note:
Ten Reasons I love You...
1. You feed me
2. You make me laugh
3. You make my life non-miserable
4. You adore me
5. You make me feel like I'm a part of something special
6. You make me feel safe
7. You care about me
8. You make me feel special
9. You help me on stuff I can't do
10. You make me feel like I'm at home all the time
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| EK's reasons she loves me: "You play with me. You are nice. You cook good food. I love when you put me to bed." |
"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we could ask or imagine." Ephesians 3:20
Mother's Day always brings out intense emotions in me. Everyday I am thankful to have these 4 babes entrusted to me. Mother's Day is a day that I am supposed to be honored and pampered. Except that I also intensely remember the days of pain and agony when I was waiting to be called mom. I can't ever forget. So on this holiday I just can't forget those that are suffering and in pain...whether it's from infertility, loss or broken dreams and unanswered prayers. I also can't help but think of a birth mama somewhere in Ukraine that we will never know but who gave us an unimaginable gift in Samuel.
When I have emotions like these and I know of stories all around me of brokenness and difficult situations I just have to cling to a truth I hold dear. God writes the best stories. He paints the most beautiful tapestries weaving together the colors and threads into a picture that is good and gives Him glory. Sometimes we only see one color or one thread and we don't know how it's going to come out beautiful. But it does. And it will. And sometimes it won't be finished until heaven. I'm so thankful that the Lord has used the broken parts of my story to bring beauty. It's not always easy and I don't always understand His ways, but I trust Him. And I love Him. And I thank Him for answering my prayers and giving me children. It is my highest honor.
